How to change behaviour patterns

All fixed set patterns are incapable of adaptability or pliability. The truth is outside of all fixed patterns.” Bruce Lee

How to change behaviour patterns

What stance do you take when faced with a situation?

Six Stances

Mommy: Everything you do is perfect, I see you, the recipient feels HUGE

Archeologist: Major curiosity and high inquiry, this stance asks lots of questions and is continually curious

Mother “_ucker”: Hard core, tell-it-like-it-is, no sugar coating, this stance is direct but not mean

Professor: Cool/low emotion, high advocacy, factual, “this is how it is”, “when you do x, you get y”

Best Buddy: Highly empathetic, “I’ve been there, I know how hard it is”

Guru: The wise knowledgeable one, often used by consultants, has a touch of Professor but with warmth and heart

The above are six stances from Bryan Franklin (

As per Christine Camaford Lynch

Being influential is essential to lead, to feel strong, and to help your team feel you are capable. So why is being influential sometimes hard? Because it requires us to at time step out of ourselves and our world, to let go of our identity in order to help effect change. Being truly influential requires us to step into the most effective persona to influence the outcome we want. It requires us to put our ego on the shelf.

Being influential is directly tied to being flexible. Most of us are highly predictable. We react in predictable ways, we have predictable patterns of behavior, we have predictable speech patterns. No wonder it’s so easy for people to peg us!

How to change behaviour patterns

As much as it maybe disturbing for others, you can do some of the following things to break your habit patterns:

  • Take a different route on the way back
  • Change your furniture around every so often
  • Try doing new things
  • Travel to a new place
  • Meet new people
  • Go watch a movie that you normally won’t (Independent films are great)
  • Pretend to be a tourist in your own city
  • Wear a costume at a party, halloween or just to work for the fun of it
  • Try one thing daily that scares you
  • Learn a language
  • Try new foods

Above all be easy on yourself and show yourself the compassion, patience and understanding that you would extent to others. Record your success and build on it. Find an accountability partner. Celebrate.

Normally, 14 to 21 days of doing something different will allow you to break the pattern.

How to change behaviour patterns is an open dialogue and we welcome your comments and suggestions.


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