Importance of Valuing Yourself

“Don’t you dare, for one more second, surround yourself with people who are not aware of the greatness that you are.” -Jo Blackwell-Preston

In a vast majority of South Asian families, children are seen, but not heard.  In extreme cases, parents encourage children to not spend time around adults.

Your basic needs are met, but you are not spoken with respect, care and consideration.

If you feel that you are not important, you have to start with basic assertions as to you exist, you matter and your life has a meaning.

Do you often come across, when you are speaking and nobody is listening?

It is easy to have people devalue you unless you assert your own value.

If you believe in the importance of valuing yourself, you will find ways to assert it.

Come, come, whoever you are.
Wanderer, Worshipper, lover of leaving.
It doesn’t matter.
Ours is not a caravan of despair.
Come, even if you have broken your vow a hundred times.
Come, yet again, come, come.
– Rumi

Forgive yourself and be merciful to yourself in valuing yourself.

Here are some suggestions as to what you can do, if you are feeling devalued:

  • Say less than necessary
  • Take a step back and look at the situation
  • Put distance between yourself and the person who is putting you down
  • Limit your communication with the person
  • Look at your behaviour to see what promotes this behaviour and refrain from it i.e., over communication
  • You don’t have to understand what is going on with that person to take action
  • Disagree with people’s valuation of you
  • Build yourself from inside being true to your self and working on yourself to have impeccable integrity
  • See yourself as a process where you are learning, growing and contributing
  • Picture yourself as a house under construction while you are living in it
  • Self-compassion is important where you forgive yourself for your own imperfections, shortcomings and mistakes
  • Love yourself and hold yourself in a high regard
  • Take good care of your body, appearance and energy
  • Carry yourself royally

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will spend its whole life believing that it is stupid.” -Albert Einstein

In addition you can use affirmations as:

I am important
I value myself
I respect myself
I am holding the floor

Act it until you make it. Even if you are not feeling it, picture yourself as a sheep wearing a lion’s skin and go out in the world.

Here are some quotations about the importance of valuing yourself:

Your chances of success in any undertaking can always be measured by your belief in yourself. -Robert Collier

I wish I could show you, When you are lonely or in darkness, The astonishing light of your own being. -Hafiz

Tell me how a person judges his or her self-esteem and I will tell you how that person operates at work, in love, in sex, in parenting, in every important aspect of existence – and how high he or she is likely to rise. The reputation you have with yourself – your self-esteem – is the single most important factor for a fulfilling life.
~Nathaniel Branden

Having a low opinion of yourself is not “modesty”. It’s self-destruction. Holding your uniqueness in high regard is not “egotism”. It’s a necessary precondition to happiness and success. ~Bobbe Sommer

Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one’s own sunshine. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love & affection. ~Buddha

Of all the judgements we pass in life, none is more important than the judgment we pass on ourselves.

~Nathaniel Branden

Appreciation and self-love are the most important tools that you could ever nurture. Appreciation of others, and the appreciation of yourself is the closest vibrational match to your Source Energy of anything that we’ve ever witnessed anywhere in the Universe. ~Abraham

A story about importance of valuing yourself

A well known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20 bill. In the room of 200, he asked. “Who would like this $20 bill?”

Hands started going up. He said, “I am going to give this $20 to one of you, but first, let me do this.”

He proceeded to crumple the 20 dollar note up. He then asked. “Who still wants it?” Still the hands were up in the air.

“Well,” he replied, “what if I do this?” He dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. “Now, who still wants it?”

Still the hands went into the air.

“My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20.

Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless; but no matter what happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.

Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who love you. The worth of our lives comes, not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE.

You are special, don’t ever forget it.”

Author Unknown

Also read blog: How do you relate to yourself?/You are your own star


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